Are You Stalking Him?
For better or for worse, having easy online access to other people’s personal lives through social media sites like Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest and Twitter lets us learn more than ever before about a person who has captured out attention. Sometimes it is people we already know that set us on a path to peeking into photo albums or tracking them from public check-ins at restaurants and clubs. Other times, just knowing the name of an intriguing guy makes it possible to start fact-finding. He may not even know that he is being virtually followed by someone who wants to learn more about him so that she can make him desire her.
We Are All Virtual Voyeurs
It was not so long ago that men and women got to know each other by spending time together in the same place. No one but our families knew what we ate for dinner last night. Our photo albums were stored in closets, out of sight except for reminiscing during reunions with friends. Updates from far-flung relatives came once or twice a year in birthday or holiday card greetings. If a woman wanted to make him desire her, she had to observe his tastes in person or find them out from his friends.
The situation is very different today, and we have the choice to share as little or as much with others as our social media security settings will allow. That phone or computer monitor screen can double as a window into the world of just about any man who is also sharing his life online. It is easier than ever to learn intimate things about virtual strangers.
Is it always right to look into that window? Doing so means that you can know his favorite foods, his musical tastes and how he feels about his job, without ever having a face-to-face conversation. These tidbits of knowledge about a man can help a woman who wants to know how to make him desire her. Unfortunately, they also open the possibility that we might see things we do not like, or which make us jealous and go into stalker mode.
A lesson learned from the animal kingdom is that when one warm blooded being wants another, the predator will do just about anything to capture its prey. An appetite for food or sex is deep, powerful and primal. We are born with desires for things that keep us alive on an individual basis and also as a species, and no amount of technological taming will destroy those instincts. Wanting to make him desire you may seem like a choice you can control, but it is not always so. Success in the chase, and ultimate survival, depends on quenching that thirst.
The faces of some of our favorite creatures reveal whether they play the role of the former or the latter in the natural world: two eyes that look straight ahead, such as those of cats or humans, indicate predator status. Meanwhile, eyes on either side of the face, such as those of birds (except owls) and fish, are a defense mechanism of animals who are hunted and need to scan the horizon for threats. When we want someone, the focus must be straight ahead. Men can be easily outsmarted and trapped by a predatory woman.
Prey For Desire
Of course, the ability to learn a lot about others means that people can learn private things about us, too. We forget this as we over-share the details of our lives online. Putting it all out there, whether by posting photographs from a night out with girlfriends that show a lot of skin, or updating one’s Facebook status every hour on the hour, can signal to a man that there is nothing left to know.
We might think it is sexy and attractive to reveal ourselves in this way, but it can backfire big-time when a man sees everything online and does not want to explore a woman’s mind (and body) in person. The woman who wants to know “How To Make Him Desire” her will heed the advice of grandmothers everywhere: less is more, ladies.
To learn more about the line between searching and stalking, check out Alex Carter’s “How To Make Him Desire You”. The book is a great guide for women who wish to inch closer and closer to a man without scaring him away for good.